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The World Looks Red

Started by BLOODY MESS , May 02 2008 07:03 AM

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21 replies to this topic

#1
BLOODY MESS
Posted 02 May 2008 - 07:03 AM

BLOODY MESS

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Push it away
The world looks red
People with fish eyes
The ground sucks
Walk on my fingertips
Displacing the fog
The weight of my body
is too mush to bear
The memory drained
the life from the dull
An ocean of insects
worked like a sheet
the immovable fact
Buried my mind
in a horse-hair coat
in a pile
on the floor

Push it away
The world looks red
People with fish eyes
The ground sucks
Walk on my fingertips
Displacing the fog
The weight of my body
Is too much to bear
The memory drained
The life from the doll
The ocean of insects
Moved like a sheet
The immovable fact
Buried my mind
In a horsehair coat
In a pile
On the floor
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#2
RipleyXXX
Posted 02 May 2008 - 07:06 AM

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What the hell was that?!
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#3
BLOODY MESS
Posted 02 May 2008 - 07:21 AM

BLOODY MESS

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Are you impressed ?
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#4
RipleyXXX
Posted 02 May 2008 - 07:26 AM

RipleyXXX

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*laughs*

Do I sound it?

No!

Fucking hell.
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#5
x.suicidalkiss.x
Posted 02 May 2008 - 07:37 AM

x.suicidalkiss.x

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mazing
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#6
LaughableEmo
Posted 02 May 2008 - 07:37 AM

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OMG, this poem makes me XOXOXO my soul. You are so talented. It reminds me of T.S. Elliot.
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#7
BLOODY MESS
Posted 02 May 2008 - 07:45 AM

BLOODY MESS

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Bongzilla, where did you find those rhymes, it's fantastic !!!
LaughableEmo, thank you. I've been inspired by M. Gira's book, "The Deadly Swans". A great writer.
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#8
finality
Posted 02 May 2008 - 07:58 AM

finality

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I thought it sucked.
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#9
BLOODY MESS
Posted 02 May 2008 - 08:05 AM

BLOODY MESS

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That's not very kind...
I feel sad now.
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#10
Emotronic
Posted 02 May 2008 - 08:43 AM

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OMFG this rules!!
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#11
RipleyXXX
Posted 03 May 2008 - 03:14 AM

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QUOTE (VeNnnGeAnCeThouShaltBeMine @ May 2 2008, 04:58 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I thought it sucked.


OMG! SOMEONE WITH SENSE!
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#12
finality
Posted 03 May 2008 - 03:42 AM

finality

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QUOTE (bongzilla666 @ May 2 2008, 05:09 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
didn't you take emo 101? you shouldn't say those things to an emo. he might go to far with his cutting.
If he posts it on here, its open for discussion. And if he wants to go too far with his cutting, just because I didnt like his poem, its not my problem.
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#13
RipleyXXX
Posted 03 May 2008 - 04:16 AM

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QUOTE (VeNnnGeAnCeThouShaltBeMine @ May 3 2008, 12:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
If he posts it on here, its open for discussion. And if he wants to go too far with his cutting, just because I didnt like his poem, its not my problem.


Fair point...
And the poem DOES suck!
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#14
BLOODY MESS
Posted 03 May 2008 - 06:16 AM

BLOODY MESS

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You don't like the TRUE POETRY, heretics !!!
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#15
finality
Posted 03 May 2008 - 07:48 AM

finality

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QUOTE (BOODY MESS @ May 3 2008, 03:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
You don't like the TRUE POETRY, heretics !!!
Everyone liked my poetry thread... Before it got deleted. >=[ i fixed the poem i put up, btw.
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#16
BLOODY MESS
Posted 03 May 2008 - 08:40 AM

BLOODY MESS

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What 's the problem with your poetry ? You talks about it all the time but I still don't understand.
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#17
Emotronic
Posted 03 May 2008 - 10:04 AM

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Nah dudes, this poem rules! It's hardcore poetry though it's hard to understand: at first I felt confusion, but next I understood it was pure reversed love.
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#18
finality
Posted 03 May 2008 - 11:13 AM

finality

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QUOTE (Emotronic @ May 3 2008, 07:04 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Nah dudes, this poem rules! It's hardcore poetry though it's hard to understand: at first I felt confusion, but next I understood it was pure reversed love.
eh... Nope. I understood it, alright. I just didnt like it, is all.
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#19
finality
Posted 03 May 2008 - 11:16 AM

finality

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Il rephrase that: I know the effect he was trying to achieve, he just isnt very good at it.

Il rephrase that: I know the effect he was trying to achieve, he just isnt very good at it.
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#20
BLOODY MESS
Posted 03 May 2008 - 11:19 AM

BLOODY MESS

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You rephrased it twice.
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