it doesn't break in stanza 4. 0_o; but in 6 it does, yes.
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Xx Being In Love Xx
Started by
xx_i_cry_alone_xx
, Oct 05 2008 10:56 PM
#21
Posted 18 December 2008 - 03:56 PM
#22
Posted 19 December 2008 - 09:25 PM
i love it...i need a little more practice...lol
#23
Posted 30 December 2008 - 06:45 AM
what a great poem, it makes me want to grab a knife from downstairs and show my feelings
#24
Posted 31 December 2008 - 10:34 AM
wow this is really good i actually had a tear fall from my eyes....i know how this is....i wasnt related to him but i saw it. blood dripping from his wrists and a gun shot in his head. we found him in a lake inside his car. he was my friends dads bestfriend. even when i see what happened to him, i still believe tht he is better where ever he is cuz he's not suffering like he was when he was living. he's moved on.
#25
Posted 06 January 2009 - 06:21 AM
i loved ur poetry, i hate commenting, but, it was really gud, u shud stop listenin to othr ppl tho, their comments dont even matter, hopefully u write for urself
#26
Posted 08 January 2009 - 05:34 AM
QUOTE (xx_i_cry_alone_xx @ Oct 5 2008, 09:26 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Xx Being In Love xX
One look, one touch, one kiss
Thinking how could she lose this?
the one person she did love and need
Her death was something he couldnt concede
Knowing she wouldnt last long
Taking her life was something she didnt get wrong
Loving the way he looked at her made her blush
Sleeping with him was something they didnt rush
Giving him her all, Giving him everything
Was it a mistake that he proposed to her with that ring?
She realised in love with him wasnt how she pictured in her dream
Things were worse than they did seem
He wasnt in love with her which the whole time he knew
Lying when he said baby i love you
believing that what he spoke was true
Was her biggest downfall all the way through
Laying on their bed
So many tiny crystal tears she did shed
Thinking things through and through in her head
Asking why do i live if i live to die?
More and more tears she does cry
Taking out her shiny silver toy
Screaming now he will bring the final time of joy
Upon her wrist she makes the once final mark
Going up along her bright blue vein
Wishing he would love her just once again
Tears mixing with the blood as she just lies here
Slowly she is dying as she realises no one is near
Hoping she achieved his worst fear
Of coming home and finding her gone
This day was the worst when we came home
Finding her like we did all i did was blame
For that now i feel nothing but shame
Those were his words exactly as she heard
Hearing this she realised she was free no more a muttered word
Those three words she realised were not enough to be true
She whispers in his ear baby i still will protect you
Leaving this place her spirit goes confused on what to do
copyright melina hendren
One look, one touch, one kiss
Thinking how could she lose this?
the one person she did love and need
Her death was something he couldnt concede
Knowing she wouldnt last long
Taking her life was something she didnt get wrong
Loving the way he looked at her made her blush
Sleeping with him was something they didnt rush
Giving him her all, Giving him everything
Was it a mistake that he proposed to her with that ring?
She realised in love with him wasnt how she pictured in her dream
Things were worse than they did seem
He wasnt in love with her which the whole time he knew
Lying when he said baby i love you
believing that what he spoke was true
Was her biggest downfall all the way through
Laying on their bed
So many tiny crystal tears she did shed
Thinking things through and through in her head
Asking why do i live if i live to die?
More and more tears she does cry
Taking out her shiny silver toy
Screaming now he will bring the final time of joy
Upon her wrist she makes the once final mark
Going up along her bright blue vein
Wishing he would love her just once again
Tears mixing with the blood as she just lies here
Slowly she is dying as she realises no one is near
Hoping she achieved his worst fear
Of coming home and finding her gone
This day was the worst when we came home
Finding her like we did all i did was blame
For that now i feel nothing but shame
Those were his words exactly as she heard
Hearing this she realised she was free no more a muttered word
Those three words she realised were not enough to be true
She whispers in his ear baby i still will protect you
Leaving this place her spirit goes confused on what to do
copyright melina hendren
omg i love it i can kind of relate to it it is defenetly in itrs place in the best selection
#27
Posted 22 January 2009 - 12:49 PM
Great poem,you're talented.
#28
Posted 22 January 2009 - 06:05 PM
ur so fucking good at poetry i also write poetry to and i can relate to this poem and it sucks when u feel this way oh and wanna be friends
QUOTE (xx_i_cry_alone_xx @ Oct 5 2008, 10:56 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Xx Being In Love xX
One look, one touch, one kiss
Thinking how could she lose this?
the one person she did love and need
Her death was something he couldnt concede
Knowing she wouldnt last long
Taking her life was something she didnt get wrong
Loving the way he looked at her made her blush
Sleeping with him was something they didnt rush
Giving him her all, Giving him everything
Was it a mistake that he proposed to her with that ring?
She realised in love with him wasnt how she pictured in her dream
Things were worse than they did seem
He wasnt in love with her which the whole time he knew
Lying when he said baby i love you
believing that what he spoke was true
Was her biggest downfall all the way through
Laying on their bed
So many tiny crystal tears she did shed
Thinking things through and through in her head
Asking why do i live if i live to die?
More and more tears she does cry
Taking out her shiny silver toy
Screaming now he will bring the final time of joy
Upon her wrist she makes the once final mark
Going up along her bright blue vein
Wishing he would love her just once again
Tears mixing with the blood as she just lies here
Slowly she is dying as she realises no one is near
Hoping she achieved his worst fear
Of coming home and finding her gone
This day was the worst when we came home
Finding her like we did all i did was blame
For that now i feel nothing but shame
Those were his words exactly as she heard
Hearing this she realised she was free no more a muttered word
Those three words she realised were not enough to be true
She whispers in his ear baby i still will protect you
Leaving this place her spirit goes confused on what to do
copyright melina hendren
One look, one touch, one kiss
Thinking how could she lose this?
the one person she did love and need
Her death was something he couldnt concede
Knowing she wouldnt last long
Taking her life was something she didnt get wrong
Loving the way he looked at her made her blush
Sleeping with him was something they didnt rush
Giving him her all, Giving him everything
Was it a mistake that he proposed to her with that ring?
She realised in love with him wasnt how she pictured in her dream
Things were worse than they did seem
He wasnt in love with her which the whole time he knew
Lying when he said baby i love you
believing that what he spoke was true
Was her biggest downfall all the way through
Laying on their bed
So many tiny crystal tears she did shed
Thinking things through and through in her head
Asking why do i live if i live to die?
More and more tears she does cry
Taking out her shiny silver toy
Screaming now he will bring the final time of joy
Upon her wrist she makes the once final mark
Going up along her bright blue vein
Wishing he would love her just once again
Tears mixing with the blood as she just lies here
Slowly she is dying as she realises no one is near
Hoping she achieved his worst fear
Of coming home and finding her gone
This day was the worst when we came home
Finding her like we did all i did was blame
For that now i feel nothing but shame
Those were his words exactly as she heard
Hearing this she realised she was free no more a muttered word
Those three words she realised were not enough to be true
She whispers in his ear baby i still will protect you
Leaving this place her spirit goes confused on what to do
copyright melina hendren
#29
Posted 01 June 2009 - 03:10 PM
You are very talented. Nice poem.
#30
Posted 04 June 2009 - 05:32 PM
[/size]Tell me if this is a good poem ok...
message me..
[size="5"] I tried to tell you i love you
but the words were hard to find
im always thinking about you
you're the only one on my mind.
oh why do i act so shy forever hiding my face
i should learn to laugh and not to cry put yourself in my place.
there were times where i tried to kiss you but something told me no
you wanted me to hold you but i
keep letting you go.
im afraid that i am not the girl
you've searched for all of these years.
i will kindly leave now don't you cry
try to hold back your tears.
its been so long i hav'nt seen you
for quite awhile
when i think of how we me met it only
brings back your smile.
i remember when i held you then and
told you wed never part
i loved you then i love you now and
i'll hold you in my heart.
message me..
[size="5"] I tried to tell you i love you
but the words were hard to find
im always thinking about you
you're the only one on my mind.
oh why do i act so shy forever hiding my face
i should learn to laugh and not to cry put yourself in my place.
there were times where i tried to kiss you but something told me no
you wanted me to hold you but i
keep letting you go.
im afraid that i am not the girl
you've searched for all of these years.
i will kindly leave now don't you cry
try to hold back your tears.
its been so long i hav'nt seen you
for quite awhile
when i think of how we me met it only
brings back your smile.
i remember when i held you then and
told you wed never part
i loved you then i love you now and
i'll hold you in my heart.
#31
Posted 20 June 2009 - 06:54 AM
the best, Talented filipino eh , great work
..., and please wait for my new poem, hope u like it too...
..., and please wait for my new poem, hope u like it too...
#32
Posted 27 June 2009 - 09:06 AM
omigosh ur so good...
I luv the poem..♥
It's really emotional...
I luv the poem..♥
It's really emotional...
#33
Posted 20 July 2009 - 10:20 AM
your so friggin ausum
#34
Posted 26 July 2009 - 10:51 PM
I Really Loved It, Its The Best I Ever Read. ^-^ Great Job!!
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