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Tonights the night...


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#1
StabEmosInTheHead

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I kill myself.

I'll do it when everyones in bed. Dont try talking me out of it, because I've been thinking about it for ages, and I feel as if I finally have the guts to go through with it this time.
I'm not even going to bother going on about all my problems, but it's so bad that this is all I can think about. I've tried getting help, but nothing works.

If I'm on the site tomorow, then obviously I didn't go through with it.
If not, then I'll either be in some hospital somewhere, or I'll be dead.

Hate me all you want, but I'm gunna do it tonight.
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#2
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Oh For F*cks sake, not you too?? If you are serious than so be it, be weak and feeble, give in to what it was that convinced you to do so..if your not serious then good.
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#3
StabEmosInTheHead

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I'm serious.

I might be weak, but IDC. I'm going to do it.
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#4
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QUOTE (SmileInMySleep @ Feb 17 2008, 03:30 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I'm serious.

I might be weak, but IDC. I'm going to do it.


Right, i've just finished attacking myself for being mean....

Please for the love of pasta or whatever it is you like, dont! The are people who care about you and, to some extent (I'm revealin a little here) love you. Are you willing to cause such suffering and anguish to them?
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#5
xheartxofxsorrowx

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QUOTE (SmileInMySleep @ Feb 17 2008, 08:30 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I'm serious.

I might be weak, but IDC. I'm going to do it.


Noooooooooooooo sad.gif , hope your just saying this, hope your joking......, cos your too hot to die. wub.gif

I got a load of problems too I have thought about suicide a few times but the things I love in life prevent me doing it. But you would break my heart if you killed yourself, especially as I care and really like you. Love.gif


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#6
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Please listen to us, all of us care about you and we want you to stay alive. We're all here to help eachother and stick together, not take the easy way out.
Whatever it is, you can get through it. We'll help you as much as we can, but you need to stay with us.

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#7
StabEmosInTheHead

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QUOTE (emotionalhazard @ Feb 17 2008, 07:32 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Right, i've just finished myself....

Please for the love of pasta or whatever it is you like, dont! The are people who care about you and, to some extent (I'm revealin a little here) love you. Are you willing to cause such suffering and anguish to them?

Well, I doubt anyone will miss me that much.

QUOTE (Xxfallen~tearsxX @ Feb 17 2008, 07:35 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Noooooooooooooo sad.gif , hope your just saying this, hope your joking......, cos your too hot to die. wub.gif

I got a load of problems too I have thought about suicide a few times but the things I love in life prevent me doing it. But you would break my heart if you killed yourself, especially as I care and really like you. Love.gif


Lol. You might think I'm hot, but that's not a good enough reason.
I might hurt a few people if I do this, but I hardly know any of you. And theres nobody who cares about me in real life. I have too many problems that I cant sort out.

QUOTE (Fiery Rose @ Feb 17 2008, 07:41 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Please listen to us, all of us care about you and we want you to stay alive. We're all here to help eachother and stick together, not take the easy way out.
Whatever it is, you can get through it. We'll help you as much as we can, but you need to stay with us.


Yeh, there might be people here who care about me, but this is the internet. I have real life problems that cant be sorted, and suicide is the easy way out.

I'm going to hurt people by doing this, but I've been worrying about others all my life, and nobody does the same in return. It's time I start thinking about how I feel. I'd be happier dead.

Thanks for all the help though, everyone, but I'm going through with this. I've thought about reasons to live, but to be honest, there's not that many of them.
I doubt anyone will be able to make me change my mind.

I dont want to die, but I dont want my life to be a misery either. I have tried to sort things out, but nothings going to change.

Eh, dont really know what to say. You guys are great, and I'm sorry if I hurt any of you by all this.
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#8
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QUOTE (SmileInMySleep @ Feb 17 2008, 03:52 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Well, I doubt anyone will miss me that much.



Lol. You might think I'm hot, but that's not a good enough reason.
I might hurt a few people if I do this, but I hardly know any of you. And theres nobody who cares about me in real life. I have too many problems that I cant sort out.



Yeh, there might be people here who care about me, but this is the internet. I have real life problems that cant be sorted, and suicide is the easy way out.

I'm going to hurt people by doing this, but I've been worrying about others all my life, and nobody does the same in return. It's time I start thinking about how I feel. I'd be happier dead.

Thanks for all the help though, everyone, but I'm going through with this. I've thought about reasons to live, but to be honest, there's not that many of them.
I doubt anyone will be able to make me change my mind.

I dont want to die, but I dont want my life to be a misery either. I have tried to sort things out, but nothings going to change.

Eh, dont really know what to say. You guys are great, and I'm sorry if I hurt any of you by all this.


Oh do you doubt? how can you be sure! Have you taken a look into peoples minds and found out how much you'll be missed or something? Because there are people who'll miss you...alot

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#9
Justin<3'sTheWorld

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don't do it i know me and you don't really talk but still
everyone heree is like family and if one goes we all get hurt
ok and plus you say no one cares for you look at these people
trying to stop and its early more and more will show
they care for as do i cause we are all family and we stick
together and when one of us has problems we cheer them up and
make them happy so just don't do it for me and everyone here at EC
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#10
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Aside from the fact that you havn't detailed any of these problems of which you speak
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#11
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Come on, there's so much life can offer you hun. It will get better, you just have to make it through the hard parts.
If you don't make it through the pain, how will you ever gain the happiness you deserve?
If you kill yourself, there will be so many people who will be in extreme pain. To lose someone is one of the hardest things in life, and people never know how much they are loved and cared for.
You need to make it through the darkness to reach the light.
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#12
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Exactly. SmileInMySleep, don't give in to the pain...you'll never recover if you don't fight it first....

No matter who deep the ocean, how high the mountain....there is always a plateau...you have to survive for that plateau...from there it'll get better...trust me
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#13
xXxRottenxXxPiecesxXx

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No one can stop you but you..
But take it from someone who has been there tried that
doesnt always work
the after affect of suicide is most intence then the pain you got rightnow
bout 2 or 3 years ago
things where i am was wicked bad
i thought that was my way out..
I was wrong.. it didnt work
got rushed to the ER
had surgery an fucked my shit up badd
life is hard sometimes but if it wasnt it wouldnt be life

but i mean aleast you wanna do it when everybody is alseep
i did it in front of my mom
i watched her face when that blade hit my wrist an the blood started spuing everywhere..

just double think shit before you do anything
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#14
InsaneMutantGirl

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I wish you wouldn't do it.. I wish I could help you someway..

What about giving life one more chance? Maybe it will go better? Isn't there anything else you could do? Please don't do it.. sad.gif Please..
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#15
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QUOTE (SmileInMySleep @ Feb 17 2008, 07:52 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Well, I doubt anyone will miss me that much.



Lol. You might think I'm hot, but that's not a good enough reason.
I might hurt a few people if I do this, but I hardly know any of you. And theres nobody who cares about me in real life. I have too many problems that I cant sort out.


I got a whole heap of problems that don't get sorted or nobody gives a shit about either.

Aspergers Syndrome --- makes my life very hard socially, the reason I have few friends, plus I find getting a job hard because of it. It makes me nervous in new situations and very shy.

Dyspraxia ----- I'm useless at all sports and clumsy

Also got what I think is Delerium, as some days my sight is blurred vision , other days it's all dreamy like I'm in a trance and everything is very spaced out, trippy and horrible surreal like.
Some days I can't even walk outside as it's that bad, it feels my distance perception is fucked and I fall over, bang into objects as I can't judge distances and start having short few second seizures.
It's not like that every day, but happens randomly a few times a week. But my sight never goes to normal. sad.gif

I blame my past drug use, I blame the labyrinitus inner ear infection I had affecting my sight,hearing and balance I've had a few times, I blame myself staying on the computer for hours a day. Could be all those reasons.

It's not psychosis as I don't ever hear voices or any of that shit, it's just permanent weird sight.

Bad asthma, especially bad when I get a cold, I'm like gasping for a breath, fucking doctors don't even give me oxygen for that. Think they rather see me suffer.

I'm also very sensitive, cry easy, weak all round, phyisically, mentally, emotionally. Skinny.

Got many fears of things.

I get panic attacks from certain things especially if I see police (haven't done anything wrong but have been phyisically abused by a police officer on a stop and search once, shit scared of them now) and anxiety easy.

Sometimes get IBS

Going thin on top of my head in one patch.

Some days I get terrible depression for no reason.

And a whole heap of other problems, including people treating me like utter shit like I'm worthless.



And the reasons I don't try to end all this by suicide is cos I love music,computer games,dvds, festivals, gigs, raving, clubbing, going out, and other emo guys and girls. If I didn't have any of that in my life, I probably would.


So please tell me about your problems, in PM if you like. As I can help you get out of this, not to end your life. Cos if we met I'm pretty sure we could make each other happier. Even if we are just friends.

So don't be stupid and do it, you may think about it though, but thats understandable if you have to cope with simular problems to mine.

Sometimes I feel like ending it and cry about it, but never do it as theres still things I love in life.

Hope for the best. sad.gif

And if you do it, it's likely to make me very sad, maybe even cut.


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#16
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QUOTE (Fiery Rose @ Feb 17 2008, 09:01 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Come on, there's so much life can offer you hun. It will get better, you just have to make it through the hard parts.
If you don't make it through the pain, how will you ever gain the happiness you deserve?
If you kill yourself, there will be so many people who will be in extreme pain. To lose someone is one of the hardest things in life, and people never know how much they are loved and cared for.
You need to make it through the darkness to reach the light.


Well, I've been through so much pain for years, thinking it'd get better, but it hasn't, and it wont.
My sister tried killing herself, she didn't think about how that hurt me. And my dad threatened to kill himself, he didn't think either. So why should I care?
All you guys @ EC might care, but I hardly know you all.
QUOTE (emotionalhazard @ Feb 17 2008, 09:17 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Exactly. SmileInMySleep, don't give in to the pain...you'll never recover if you don't fight it first....

No matter who deep the ocean, how high the mountain....there is always a plateau...you have to survive for that plateau...from there it'll get better...trust me


Like I said, I've waited for things to get better, but they wont.

QUOTE (xXxRottenxXxPiecesxXx @ Feb 17 2008, 09:19 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
No one can stop you but you..
But take it from someone who has been there tried that
doesnt always work
the after affect of suicide is most intence then the pain you got rightnow
bout 2 or 3 years ago
things where i am was wicked bad
i thought that was my way out..
I was wrong.. it didnt work
got rushed to the ER
had surgery an fucked my shit up badd
life is hard sometimes but if it wasnt it wouldnt be life

but i mean aleast you wanna do it when everybody is alseep
i did it in front of my mom
i watched her face when that blade hit my wrist an the blood started spuing everywhere..

just double think shit before you do anything


Sorry to hear all that.
I've thought about it, and I know what I'm going to do.
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#17
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This plateau doesn't just happen...you may be waiting until your 30, 40 perhaps later....but the euphoria once there will obliterate the pain you've suffered.
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#18
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Yeah, it WILL get better but you need to be patient.
And your sister was selfish too...And your father threatened to, but did he try?
Just because they didn't care about who they hurt, doesn't mean you have to be like them. You can be stronger.

And I know you hardly know us at all, but we still care. We're one family, and we stick together. When one person is down and feels like there is nothing left, we help. We're for eachother.
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#19
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And...there are people, contrary to your belief, who love and care for you. I do..Same as a love almost everyone on this sight...But you...and some others are special..you have been there when i was down, when others were down. And now we are here to be with you as you are down.

Don't do it! Think of all who love you and think of how they will feel!
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#20
Xx MICHAEL xX

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If hes gonna do it, And his mind is set, HES GOING TO DO IT.
But if you do choose to,
MAKE SURE YOUR GONNA DIE.
You dont want to end up brain dead in a hospital for 5 years do you?
Or mental institution....
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