yes i know, teenager loathing parent, same old thing. but he's really getting on my nerves.
well, my dad is very loving and likes to give hugs and everything, but i think it's just too much. honestly, every second he's always going, "I LOVE YOU!" and trying to hug me or just randomly touch me, no not in a dirty way. i always tell him to go away, but he never does. like, whenever i'm laying with my mom on the couch he always comes and tries to lay on me. i tell him to go away, but he doesn't. i try to push him away, but he comes back. i always yell at him to leave me alone and he just goes, "but i love you!" and i say, "i don't care, go away!" and he just keeps repeating himself, "but i love you! doesn't that matter?" i basically have to fight him off. and it repeats, every day, for the past sixteen years.
even my mom tells him to stop, but my dad won't listen. she always tells him to leave me alone. and he'll do anything if i just give him a hug, and my mom said to him, "you're just teaching her to give away affection to get stuff."
i know, i've been given the whole lecture from my friends, "well, at least it's better than him hitting you like some dads." but i somehow can't help but feel that this can't be quite mentally healthy and not quite right. for example, i find that when i'm with my friends i tend to get kinda clingy like my dad. like, i always lean on them and give an excessive amount of hugs and stuff. fortunately, most of them think it's cute so they don't find it annoying. but one day when i'm actually living with people other than my parents and my brother, i can't help but wonder what i'll be like.
so, does anyone have any suggestions on how to make him stop being like this? or if not, is there a way i can make sure it doesn't influence me too much?
and i'm sorry if it's kinda long, i tend to go on sometimes.
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I Think My Dad Loves Me A Little Too Much
Started by
xEmx
, May 05 2010 05:56 PM
#1
Posted 05 May 2010 - 05:56 PM
#2
Posted 05 May 2010 - 06:22 PM
Don't do what he does?
#3
Posted 05 May 2010 - 06:36 PM
easier said than done.
since he's been like that my whole life and for some reason nothing i do can change it, it's pretty much become how i was raised. hugs, physical contact at all times, be obsessively loving, if they say stop, who cares?
since he's been like that my whole life and for some reason nothing i do can change it, it's pretty much become how i was raised. hugs, physical contact at all times, be obsessively loving, if they say stop, who cares?
#4
Posted 05 May 2010 - 07:57 PM
How dare that bastard hug his daughter and tell her he loves her? What an asshole.
#5
Posted 05 May 2010 - 10:24 PM
QUOTE (-Wretch @ May 6 2010, 04:57 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
How dare that bastard hug his daughter and tell her he loves her? What an asshole.
The point being made is that he does it to excess
Like smothering, sometimes it can be too much
OP instead of shouting at him try being mature about it and talk to him like an adult
#6
Posted 06 May 2010 - 12:28 PM
i've tried talking to him, it doesn't work. he has the listening skills of a toddler.
#7
Posted 06 May 2010 - 01:18 PM
Just say you hate him and that he's the worse dad ever, that should do it.
Make sure you shout to.
Make sure you shout to.
#8
Posted 06 May 2010 - 01:26 PM
QUOTE (Colourblind @ May 6 2010, 10:18 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Just say you hate him and that he's the worse dad ever, that should do it.
Make sure you shout to.
Make sure you shout to.
God your parents must love you
#9
Posted 06 May 2010 - 01:35 PM
QUOTE (Colourblind @ May 6 2010, 01:18 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Just say you hate him and that he's the worse dad ever, that should do it.
Make sure you shout to.
Make sure you shout to.
i've thought of doing that, but despite the fact that i can be rather heartless and i feel like killing him, i would feel bad. very few things make me feel bad but for some reason the person who makes me feel like tearing my hair out makes me feel bad.
#10
Posted 06 May 2010 - 02:05 PM
QUOTE (xEmx @ May 6 2010, 10:35 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
i've thought of doing that, but despite the fact that i can be rather heartless and i feel like killing him, i would feel bad. very few things make me feel bad but for some reason the person who makes me feel like tearing my hair out makes me feel bad.
You should feel bad if you do such a thing. Just talk to him, make him listen. Also count your blessings, your lucky to have a Dad around at all.
#11
Posted 06 May 2010 - 02:48 PM
You feel like killing him because he openly shows his affection and care for you?
Christ I wish my father was like that, instead of a hard ass on me. No offense, but you've no idea how blessed you are. Even if it is awkward or sometimes smothering. Most people wish they even knew their dad.
You can't just learn how to be a "good dad" so fathers will try to do what they feel will make their children love, respect and appreciate them. To be honest, It's probably almost every father's nightmare to have children who deeply resent them. I know it would be mine.
Christ I wish my father was like that, instead of a hard ass on me. No offense, but you've no idea how blessed you are. Even if it is awkward or sometimes smothering. Most people wish they even knew their dad.
You can't just learn how to be a "good dad" so fathers will try to do what they feel will make their children love, respect and appreciate them. To be honest, It's probably almost every father's nightmare to have children who deeply resent them. I know it would be mine.
#12
Posted 06 May 2010 - 07:03 PM
#13
Posted 07 May 2010 - 09:09 AM
QUOTE (Lightning. @ May 6 2010, 01:24 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
The point being made is that he does it to excess
Like smothering, sometimes it can be too much
OP instead of shouting at him try being mature about it and talk to him like an adult
Like smothering, sometimes it can be too much
OP instead of shouting at him try being mature about it and talk to him like an adult
Yeah. Got that. However, see this:
QUOTE (No Quarter @ May 6 2010, 05:48 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
You feel like killing him because he openly shows his affection and care for you?
Christ I wish my father was like that, instead of a hard ass on me. No offense, but you've no idea how blessed you are. Even if it is awkward or sometimes smothering. Most people wish they even knew their dad.
You can't just learn how to be a "good dad" so fathers will try to do what they feel will make their children love, respect and appreciate them. To be honest, It's probably almost every father's nightmare to have children who deeply resent them. I know it would be mine.
Christ I wish my father was like that, instead of a hard ass on me. No offense, but you've no idea how blessed you are. Even if it is awkward or sometimes smothering. Most people wish they even knew their dad.
You can't just learn how to be a "good dad" so fathers will try to do what they feel will make their children love, respect and appreciate them. To be honest, It's probably almost every father's nightmare to have children who deeply resent them. I know it would be mine.
Of all the things to complain about.
#14
Posted 07 May 2010 - 11:16 AM
I think your dad loved me a little too much too.
#15
Posted 07 May 2010 - 11:18 AM
Still can't sit down Pete?
#16
Posted 07 May 2010 - 11:24 AM
QUOTE (TC Styles @ May 7 2010, 08:18 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Still can't sit down Pete?
You should've seen him in action. It was like a set of pistons in an ocean liner engine room.
But 4 srs... Daddy loving you too much in the legal way is a good thing. You're just a pain in the ass daughter. You think about killing him and telling him of your hatred? He should put you up for adoption and take in someone more grateful to be honest.
#17
Posted 07 May 2010 - 11:58 AM
QUOTE (Mr Blonde @ May 7 2010, 11:24 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
You should've seen him in action. It was like a set of pistons in an ocean liner engine room.
I think I just fell in love.
QUOTE (Mr Blonde @ May 7 2010, 11:24 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
But 4 srs... Daddy loving you too much in the legal way is a good thing. You're just a pain in the ass daughter. You think about killing him and telling him of your hatred? He should put you up for adoption and take in someone more grateful to be honest.
Quite harsh, but sounds right, IMO.
Just let it be. Your dad knows the days of you being daddys and mommys little girl are short. Let them have the fun, love and compassion they deserve.
#18
Posted 07 May 2010 - 06:53 PM
the thing is, everything he does is legal in every way. but i still can't help but feel like it's kinda...not. like telling someone to stop and then they don't. and when i try to get up to leave he goes "no stay!" and physically holds me down so i can't leave.
#19
Posted 08 May 2010 - 03:02 AM
If we are talking about abuse then it's a no brainer, you go to the police.
If it's not then you have no reason to be moaning.
If it's not then you have no reason to be moaning.
#20
Posted 08 May 2010 - 03:37 AM
you know how many people out there want their dad s to be loving as yours, and actually care about them? Maybe you should stop complaining and love him back if it s really a ''fatherly'' love. If it s getting more complicated and more than a father- daughter love then you have to let your mom know and talk to the authorities about it?
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