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How To Get The Best Answers Possible. Read Before Posting.


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This is an updated guide on how to get the best answers possible from this section and how to give good advice. Please read it thoroughly before posting a new topic or replying to one.

Hey there. welcome to EC and welcome to the Help and Advice section, I'm Leah and I am a member of the moderating team. I have my attention focused on this section and moderate with eagle eyed vigilance. We also work with Jessticles and the other mods in maintaining this section, making sure you all behave and tidying things up.

This section is for people who have a problem that they can't resolve themselves or would like other opinions on, from relationships and broken hearts to household troubles and everything in between.

Posting a thread? Rules:
DON'T ASK ABOUT MEDICAL PROBLEMS.
-We aren't professionals and our advice won't be accurate and may even be harmful. I mean c'mon, you want people on 'emo corner' to give medical advice? It isn't safe and i'm afraid those threads will be locked. I'd suggest joining a medical forum or actually going to your doctor or GP, you'll get real advice there and they can actually ASSESS the problem and find the causes.

Don't post more than one thread about problems.
-If you have a problem, post one thread about it. If the thread doesn't get replies immediately, don't create another thread, just wait it out. You're probably going to get a few replies filtering in, but advice giving is often something that needs to be thought about in advance before replying. Sometimes the forum is dead meaning you won't get a reply til more people log on. Just have patience.

Make sure your grammar and spelling are to a decent standard.
-We aren't expecting everyone to be awesome at English and for some it's a second or third language. However, we aren't being unreasonable in asking that you type in full sentences, use appropriate punctuation when possible(i.e full stops and commas so we don't have walls of text) and don't use text talk/capitalise every word. If you post something that's difficult to read it will be edited, however this is a waste of our time if you can do it right in the first place out of courtesy. Try not to use annoying fonts or colours either, makes our old-before-our-time heads hurt.
If you're having problems with your english, either note why at the bottom of the post so you aren't flamed, PM a mod to help you out with any english problems or translation or install firefox spell checker to help with everyday spelling errors. Don't say 'u' instead of 'you' or other variables of text talk.

Don't complain about advice.
-Sometimes, it's the harsh realities that are needed when giving adivce. Don't like what you've been told? It's YOU with the problem, not us.We aren't obliged to answer or help but we do because we want to help out. If we believe you're acting immature we will tell you. The exception to this is if you're being flamed - if you feel you've been unjustly flamed either report it using the report button to the bottom left of a post so we can evaluate the appropriate action, PM a full mod/admin, myself or deal with it yourself maturely.

Don't constantly bump threads.
-Refer to the first point about multiple threads - sometimes the forum is fairly inactive. Give it time and don't bump it. If other threads have had a lot of replies and yours hasn't after a few days, then you can bump it if you want to. Also - try not to bump old threads, i.e those created over a month ago in which the OP hasn't replied. they most likely won't be back on EC for a good while.

DO NOT be over dramatic.
-We've heard it all about how your life is so so difficult and no-one has ever had it so bad. Being over dramatic will probably result in a 'troll-call' or flaming. We don't want to know about how 'so emoz' you are. We also HATE people claiming that they've tried every possible help and situation we give you - just saying ' i've tried eevvveerryyythhiiingggggg, noone cares, YOU CANT HELP MEEEEE' will not make people want to help and your thread WILL be locked. K? K.

Don't have personal conversations in threads.
-If you wanna have a personal conversation and go off topic, do it in profile comments or in PM's. Keep the advice and discussion mature, i'm afraid my bullshit tolerance levels in this section are ridiculously low and i'm not going to be afraid to tell you to shut the fuck up and keep on topic if I have to, no matter what your age or status.

EXPLAIN YOUR SITUATION FULLY.
-There's nothing more frustrating than people only giving half a scenario. How are we supposed to help? Give ALL the information on a situation that is necessary otherwise our advice won't be entirely valid. It's also obvious if a situation is being milked. If we ask you to elaborate you have 3 days to do so. If you have been online in those three days and not done so, your topic will be locked. So one sentence threads like: 'She broke my hart and ah carnt live help me plz'; 'i h8 my lyf plz sum1 tlk 2 me' etc will probably be locked if you ignore a request to elaborate.

Don't want the topic?
PM a mod - either myself, or any of the Green or Red mods online and it will be locked if we think it needs to be.

Giving advice? Rules:

Don't flame unessecarily.
-We dont' care if you don't like the OP, don't flame. It's unfair on the person looking for advice. If the OP thinks they're being flamed badly, they can contact a mod via the report system or by messaging them and we'll take care of it on your behalf.

Give CONSTRUCTIVE advice.
-Your advice should actually help the OP, not tell them how idiotic they are. If you can't think of anything helpful, DON'T POST. It's that simple. If you just have a one line quip or an amusing picture, don't bother.

Be considerate.
-Some people genuinely have difficulties with spelling and the english language in general. Unless their typing is atrocious and it's clear they could type properly should they want to and it's genuinely making things difficult to read i.e -'halp meh, ah carnt seem to do anyfink rite', there's no need to make it an issue. If you wanna be helpful, offer a translation. We usually edit these posts once spotted anyway so no need to make a big deal of it.

Don't thread hijack.
-If you're looking for help to your own problem, post your own topic. thread hijacking isn't fair. If you can't make a new topic yet becuase you're new, just give it time and post around a bit more, then you should be able to, continual post hijacking will result in a warning and you will probably be ignored but I usually try and PM newbies with problems and help them out privately.

Don't tell the mods how to do their job.
-If a topic needs to be locked, the mods will see it and lock it. It isn't necessary to have 15 posts in a thread all saying 'inb4 lock' or similar 'funnies'; we're not retarded and all have a pretty apt sense of judgement.


OK, now that's out of the way. We try to give the best advice we can think of here. If you want to give advice, try:
*Looking from every angle of the situation
*Paragraphing into seperate areas helps, so each point or situation is seperated
*THINKING before posting. If you want to give advice, it's best to think for a few minutes before posting
*If you wanna be helpful, try researching on the internet. Yeah, we know, the OP should have done that but sometimes the thought doesn't occur. Posting a link to a website you think would be useful is a good way of helping.
*Try to be sympathetic and link it to a situation you've experienced.
*Or, alternatively, be harsh and tell them what you think they need to hear (within moderation of course, there's no need for insane flaming)



THINGS THAT DON'T BELONG IN HERE.
You can post things that you need help on, for example help in singing, helping a friend, help with situations etc
However:
QUOTE (Jessticles @ Oct 11 2009, 01:50 PM) What threads not to post in Help and Advice.

Okay so lately there's been an upsurge in threads that don't really belong in this section. Obviously having your thread in the right section is a good start to getting better help. If you put it in the wrong section, people are less likely to notice it and/or reply to you. A mod will usually move it quickly enough.

Here's an example of what DOES NOT belong in Help and Advice.

Advice on Hair/Fashion/Piercings.
That belongs in the Emo hair and Fashion sub-forum.
^ There. Not here.

Gender and Sexuality problems and advice.
There's a subforum specifically designed to help you with that. I'll move the thread if needs be, but they are more helpful there than this section would be. That whole section deals with gender and sexuality issues, hence any advice you want on a sexuality issue, goes there.
Link to the Gender and Sexuality Sub-forum.

Medical Issues.
This is the big one. EC are NOT trained and qualified medical professionals. It's idiotic to ask someone on the internet for advice on a medical problem. While we can TRY and attempt to give you advice, it's much more important that you head to a hospital or your G.P. for medical advice. We simply just don't know what we're talking about in that regard, and it's better you get TRUE honest advice from a professional.


Lastly:
Our lovely admin Jessticles has put together a brilliant guide to a number of problems, found here.
The thread is a consolidation of older threads regarding bullying, eating disorders, depression, addiction, building confidence, dealing with death, and helping friends with problems.

There is also a guide to relationship-style advice located here, again with older threads regarding dealing with abusive relationships, how to get over someone, and general relationship advice.

There's an index in the first post, just look and you might find it's more helpful than you think.

Still have a problem? Have a personal problem you don't want on the boards? PM confidentially us or any other mods.
Click to PM Jess!
Click here to PM Forzare!



Thanks to NQ's original thread, Jessticles, Sentient and TerrierChad. Guys - feel free to edit.


If you have any suggestions for the thread or rules, pm me and i'll add it if it's sensible enough. Posted Image
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