20 replies to this topic

[Deathcore Softie]

Hey EC. I have a problem...its kinda big. I'm a senior in High School in Kansas and there is about 5 months left until graduation. I want to go to a technical college because I can stay close to my girlfriend and take the two classes I want to take. She wants me to go to Pratt, a college in New York, to "get a good education so I can support a family later on". I know money is always good, but I don't think I could just leave her like that to go get an education that I could get where I am right now. If you were in my spot, what would you guys do? I could also take some advice because this is really bringing me down...

[Loverboy]

In the end it's your life, your education. Choose for you, what you think is best for you.

[Deathcore Softie]

Well obviously staying here and going to the technical college. It would help avoid sadness that does not need to be created.

[elicitToxicity]

Either she's trying to say.. Fuck off..

Yeah that's all I've got.















Or she means it, though I'd probably stay, probably, probably not.. maybe cheat on her the other side, knowing I've got someone when I get back.. Yeah, sounds like a plan.

Fap fap

[Deathcore Softie]

Cheating is horrible dude...

[Nereus]

This is an easy one.

Go to Pratt. Unless she is going to be the one, then why bother. Getting an education is more important. You can meet other girls at Pratt. It's New York; there's tons of single girls here.

What if you two break up? You're going to stay close to be with her, right? I wouldn't take the chance if I was you. You're putting her before you, and that's wrong. This is your future, your life. You don't want to fuck it up.

[Deathcore Softie]

True...Gah, this is a lot to think about...

Honestly, I think she is the one. Our one year anniversary will be in a week. A year is four times longer than anyone else I have dated...I guess I'll talk to her about it. It's probably the best thing to do anyways.

[Lavinia]

Honestly, think about it.

I have two friends who were together for four years, and decided to quit college so they can move to another country and work. They had pretty good jobs there but they ended up breaking up two years after they moved. You can't guarantee you'll stick with that person. I know plenty of people who have decided to go to a university or college because they want to go to the same place as their partner, and have pretty much ended the relationship a short while after.

It's understandable you want to be with her, and at the moment feel like she's the one, but in the long run you need to think ahead. Is it practical to stay with someone at the value of your education and future, just because you're in love now?

[Deathcore Softie]

Well, no. But what if she is the one? Then I would just be throwing it all down the drain...You never know if you end it before you have the chance to see. She could be pulling one of those "If you really love someone, let them go." moments, expecting me to not really leave...

[finality]

if it's meant to be with her, it will be. that doesn't have to be right now, if you move away now you never know what might happen in the future. a year isn't a long time in relationship terms, and people change a lot in college. that generally includes what they look for in a partner.
I would definitely put my education and future first, and that's what I will, in fact, be doing next year. I've been with my boyfriend 2 years and I think it's always been clear that I'd put university first - there's a good chance I'll move to another country. you only really get one chance at college, I think whatever opportunities you get, you should take.
what's the situation with your girlfriend? could she maybe move with you?

[PageNotFound404]

Well, not sure if this is going to bite me in the ass later on, but here goes ...

My situation is same-ish, I'm in year 11 at the moment and I'll be leaving next year. I'm in a long distance relationship with a girl in New Zealand.
Now, I'm planning to go to NZ to study. Not because I want to put aside my education to be with my girl, but it happens to be a great opportunity for me to study overseas. I get to see my girlfriend as well so it's quite like a win-win situation. However, the problem is I'm deciding between a school in Wellington and a school in Wangarei. If I were to choose Wellington, finding school is not a problem, traveling around doesn't cost that much and I have a class I wanted to take there. It'd take a few more years to study until I finish university in Auckland can move to her city and so we can start dating normally again. Right now, I'm just taking chances, but if she can wait, then it's fine to be away for 2 or 3 years.

Now if I were to travel straight to Wangarei, I'd be near my girlfriend. But the problem is, I'm not sure if we would be together finally, I'm really not sure. We've been desperate to be together, so you can imagine how much joy it'd be to finally see your girl in person, be able to live with her and you know, it's wonderful. However, I'm pretty much oblivious about the schools there. Waranghei is far up North and it'd cost even more money to travel there, not to mention my family is saving all the money only enough for me and my sister to just study overseas. Also, she has her own life as well. If I just barge into her life and without any thinking I could possibly ruin both of our lives, because non of us seem to be ready. She's 3 years younger than me and I'm pretty sure she needs times as much as I do.

The point is, it's the matter of time and how long you guys can wait. I mean your education is your first priority obviously, but if it happens to be convenient at the same time, then go for it. However, I can't really tell you how to live your life. Sorry to give you such a long and vague advice. Pro-tip: Act quick and be decisive, don't be an idealist.

Trust me, I love my girl too but I need to have a future as well.

[TerrierChad]

You can either take a chance with her been "the one" and have a less education to go along with what is only a chance OR you can go get yourself an excellent education which you will have for life. Also bare in mind that if she is "the one" then she should stand by you if you go there, especially given she is encouraging you to do so. No brainer man. Go to Pratt.

[elicitToxicity]

Dude, go, it's just one year, you can both phone each other and shit. If either of you lose interest then it wasn't meant to be. if you don't, good for you. -.-

[Deathcore Softie]

Hmm....I looked at the prices for Pratt and its 40k a year...minimum. I will look at other colleges though. And you guys are right, If it was meant to be, it'll work out...=/

[Lightning.]

Never choose a relationship over education
I learned the hard way, my parents offered to sent me to a really good private school for my final exams to get into uni, I chose not to go because I wanted to stay in the same school as my then boyfriend. It went horribly wrong and it ended up ruining my exams and I didn't get into the course I wanted. It's taken me 3 years to get into the course I had wanted but it meant moving to another country to get it.

Don't sacrifice your education for something that isn't guaranteed, it's only yourself you'll hurt

[LionJess]

Never choose a relationship over education

Plus a billion.

besides, anyone who truly loves you will want the best things for you in life. In terms of future employment opportunities, you want the best possible education you can get. I don't care what relationship it is, whether you are about to get married even - you always put something like your education first. Even more so when you're at such a young age and relationships that feel as if they could last forever could end very soon. Everyone hates being told this, but you're very young, and your feelings may not necessarily stay that way - and even if they do, you should prioritise your education and getting the best out of life that you can, not compromising choices you make in your life for the sake of a relationship.

[Deathcore Softie]

Thank you everyone. Your advice will be used.

[Banditking]

If you don't have an education to support a family what makes you think she will stay with you? I am assuming this is a long term relationship.

[O Brave New World]

Join the military to really stick it to your bitch.

[Bimp]

Never choose a relationship over education

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