11 replies to this topic

[.:.Lish.:.]

So I was listening to the song "good girls bad guys" and I was thinking to myself, why is it that the good girl falls for the bad guy? Let it may be at school; the bad guy who always gets in trouble and has the most detentions, or even a bad guy in general; like a bad guy with the leather jacket being the rebel.
It may just be stereo-typical, but I'm not sure.
So what do you think on the matter of why the good girls fall for the badder guy?

[Forzare!]

there are many possible reasons. Bad boys are seen as laddish and subsenquently more macho because their traits lend themselves to stereotypical lad behaviour. Girls in popular argument/evolution are sub consciously attracted to more macho men who can look after them and their offspring and get them through life and pass on the manly traits that are seen as desirable. There are a few explanations that involve evolutionary psychology like this.

[.:.Lish.:.]

there are many possible reasons. Bad boys are seen as laddish and subsenquently more macho because their traits lend themselves to stereotypical lad behaviour. Girls in popular argument/evolution are sub consciously attracted to more macho men who can look after them and their offspring and get them through life and pass on the manly traits that are seen as desirable. There are a few explanations that involve evolutionary psychology like this.

This actually does make it alot clearer for me to understand, but what is exactly evolutionary psychology?
(Sorry not smart with big words haha).

[Fizz]

Confidence. Girls love it. Bad boys are confident. Nice guys... well some of them can be a little bit of a pussy when it comes to girls.

[Steve]

It's not the fact that they're bad, really. I agree with Fizz on the confidence part, a girl doesn't necessarily want to be with someone "nice" either because "nice" implies boring. Besides, everyone's different and most of my female friends have pretty good boyfriends, I wouldn't call them bad boys.

[NewlyGeeking]

Well girls can fall for bad guys for a number of reason, from 'he acts nice to you and a dick to everyone else and that means he cares about you' to 'I think U can change him' and everything in between.

It's not just that even... Sometimes the best thing about a "bad guy" is they can make you feel safe because they exude a "machoness", they can even say things that seem as thought they are the best deal. Like if you're talking about the past and they say something like 'I would have protected you' even if they're a few years younger and it's more just their need to show that they are tough.
Or they tell you what they've been through, what happened to make them the way they are and you just accept it, accept them cause they showed you a side they haven't shown other people.
Maybe it's just their personality when you talk to them without their friends or other people around.

There are a lot of factors.

I am just rambling though because I can't sleep, but there are a few possibilities.

[LionJess]

there are many possible reasons. Bad boys are seen as laddish and subsenquently more macho because their traits lend themselves to stereotypical lad behaviour. Girls in popular argument/evolution are sub consciously attracted to more macho men who can look after them and their offspring and get them through life and pass on the manly traits that are seen as desirable. There are a few explanations that involve evolutionary psychology like this.

Oh dear. Don't let Algernon hear you.

Having been with a few ultimate bad boys and more recently some lovely guys, there's no comparison. Nice guys win out every single time, and that doesn't have to mean boring. The problem is that bad boys are usually pretty good at disguising what they are and how they act, because they know that in comparison, very few girls will be charmed by an utter prick. I was charmed into bed and into a waste of a "relationship" by one.

[Forzare!]

This actually does make it alot clearer for me to understand, but what is exactly evolutionary psychology?
(Sorry not smart with big words haha).

A specific branch of psychology that explains things through evolution, on a very basic level. So if you have the idea that we evolve based on our genes/traits, this psychology tries to explain by behaviour based on this. It isn't necessarily right but there is evidence that can be used to support it. For example one study found women who were ovulating at the time of testing found masculine men more attractive than feminine men (it changed based on the cycle of their period... I might have that wrong though so don't shoot me guys if I do..). It makes sense in the real world that a woman would look for a man capable of defending himself against others because he can look after her and help pass on her genes, rather than looking for a pussy of a guy who wouldn't be able to protect against shit. I mean sure IRL it doesn't always work out that way though, guys who are dicks to impress women are sometimes not even macho, they're just cunts, but they have confidence and confidence helps you get through life a lot.

Oh dear. Don't let Algernon hear you.

Haha, it isn't even that I believe it particularly, it's a possible explanation thats been given though.

[Noitcelfer]

A specific branch of psychology that explains things through evolution, on a very basic level. So if you have the idea that we evolve based on our genes/traits, this psychology tries to explain by behaviour based on this. It isn't necessarily right but there is evidence that can be used to support it. For example one study found women who were ovulating at the time of testing found masculine men more attractive than feminine men (it changed based on the cycle of their period... I might have that wrong though so don't shoot me guys if I do..). It makes sense in the real world that a woman would look for a man capable of defending himself against others because he can look after her and help pass on her genes, rather than looking for a pussy of a guy who wouldn't be able to protect against shit. I mean sure IRL it doesn't always work out that way though, guys who are dicks to impress women are sometimes not even macho, they're just cunts, but they have confidence and confidence helps you get through life a lot.

You don't have that wrong, at least not based on the particular study you're talking about.

I also agree with Jess that guys who know they are assholes will go to extraordinary lengths to cover that fact. Otherwise they would be very lonely.
It is too bad that they can end up dragging others down with them.

[Steve]

Having been with a few ultimate bad boys and more recently some lovely guys, there's no comparison. Nice guys win out every single time, and that doesn't have to mean boring. The problem is that bad boys are usually pretty good at disguising what they are and how they act, because they know that in comparison, very few girls will be charmed by an utter prick. I was charmed into bed and into a waste of a "relationship" by one.

I find that usually a guy who claims himself to be a "nice guy" and also makes his complaint about girls never choosing him and going with assholes instead tend to be boring. I agree that girls don't always choose the assholes and most girls definitely don't choose them on purpose, but these self proclaimed "nice guys" tend to think that being nice is enough to be a good partner. They have to be interesting as well as nice, there's no fun in being with someone who just listens and comforts you, that's good when you're in a bad mood and need comfort, but in every day situations and on dates, that just doesn't cut it. I'm not just talking about 'nice guys' either, if a girl was like that I'd not be interested in her romantically.

From observing, the relationships with bad boys never last, though one of my friends constantly complains about how her boyfriend is such a self centered prick and won't do anything for her, he's lazy and only pays attention to her when he wants his dick sucked, she acknowledges this, yet she stays with him.. It's baffling. Maybe she thinks she can 'fix' him. Who knows.

[Algernon]

there are many possible reasons. Bad boys are seen as laddish and subsenquently more macho because their traits lend themselves to stereotypical lad behaviour. Girls in popular argument/evolution are sub consciously attracted to more macho men who can look after them and their offspring and get them through life and pass on the manly traits that are seen as desirable. There are a few explanations that involve evolutionary psychology like this.

[Bri1116]

I believe a good girl will fall for a bad boy because of many things. One reason is because she is good and the boy is someone different, out of that circle of what she is used to. Therefore she gets attracted to the complete opposite, which is the bad boy. Another reason can be that she sees other girls with that type of person and wants to fit in. Also, it can be because it gives them a feeling... like an adrenaline rush, the risk (if he is very rebellious) and that feeling automatically comes without them trying. Just put yourself in their shoes and imagine you like a boy like that, and then think of why.