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Untitled

Started by tormented_inside , Apr 26 2012 08:02 PM

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5 replies to this topic

#1
tormented_inside

Posted 26 April 2012 - 08:02 PM

Delicate Snowflake

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5 posts

Gender:Male
Country
Fav Band Silent Sanctuary
Fav Song 14 Silent Sanctuary

I try to cry me eyes out
I tried to scream, tried to shout
Just to remove all your doubts
On words that comes from my mouth

I'm not usually this way
Careless of what others say
Careless of the price I'll pay
To be with you everyday

Wish we could be together
Wish we could last forever
Wish my love would be answered
Hope God could grant my prayer

Yes, all good things come to an end
Cause our worlds just couldn't blend
Guess, it's best if we'd be friends
I love you, please comprehend

Any feedback/suggestions?
I'm new to this poem-writing thing..

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#2
wdrx

Posted 27 April 2012 - 02:13 AM

Tortured Rose

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95 posts

Gender:Male
Location:miles
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Fav Band I Killed The Prom Queen
Fav Song It Never Ends - Bring Me the Horizion

yeah, its okay i guess...kinda made me think of my ex...

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#3
RoscoBenjamin

Posted 27 April 2012 - 02:36 AM

Nigrescent Black Hole

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6,086 posts

Gender:Male
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Fav Band Jeff Buckley

3/10. The 3 for effort.

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#4
DirtyMindedLittleGirl

Posted 27 April 2012 - 04:31 AM

Spiraling Tempest

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221 posts

Gender:Female
Location:6 feet under..
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Fav Band Falling In Reverse<3
Fav Song A-Team by Ed Sheeran

i liked it.

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#5
PageNotFound404

Posted 27 April 2012 - 12:41 PM

Stupid teenager

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1,240 posts

Gender:Male
Location:The 5127th dot on the map
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Fav Band Closure
Fav Song Closure - Sebastian

I try to cry me eyes out

"WHERE'S ME GOLD?!"

I find it very silly that why would anyone write poems when they're depressed.
Sure, it's "therapeutic" or "self-expressing" or whatever, but I don't write essays when I'm depressed. Especially when I'm fully aware that my poems are almost shite and I'm no expert in poetry.

Just, why?

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#6
Steve

Posted 27 April 2012 - 03:42 PM

King of modesty

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2,444 posts

Gender:Not Telling
Location:Huddersfield
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Fav Band Breaking Benjamin
Fav Song Breaking Benjamin - Evil Angel

"WHERE'S ME GOLD?!"

I find it very silly that why would anyone write poems when they're depressed.
Sure, it's "therapeutic" or "self-expressing" or whatever, but I don't write essays when I'm depressed. Especially when I'm fully aware that my poems are almost shite and I'm no expert in poetry.

Just, why?

I write when I'm upset or depressed, it's easier to write then. I sure as hell wouldn't show anything I write to the public, most of it is garbage. I look back on it and it cheers me up thinking "woah, I was really messed up then, half of these things are mundane and the other half are ridiculous".