7 replies to this topic

[Fujoshi Otaku]

Anywayyys as the title states, yesterday was the best day ever. <3 I finally got to go to Leeds with my friends for the first time in forever, and met some new friends who are awesome, and old friends who I haven't seen for about three years. We ended up going to a bunch of pubs and getting drunk, and I ended up staying over because I didn't want to go home.
^Short version because I doubt anyone on here cares about all the details. Some highlights though...One of my friends wearing my five year old brothers coat, because it was left behind when he went home. Me beating the same friend at an arm wrestle and declaring once and for all that I am stronger than him. >:] Running down the middle of the bus station in the middle of the night wearing odd shoes. Enjoying the buzz of the others conversations at times, and being able to join in and be myself for once.

And...This part deserves its own paragraph. I finally got to see the guy I have liked for the past...five...maybe longer years, and who I haven't seen for three years. I was so nervous, I thought I wouldn't be able to talk to him at all, and he would think I was a complete idiot...Well, after an initially quiet start, and small conversation while I was still in shy mode, he saw the manga books I had purchased earlier that day. ^w^ Turns out we both like Japanese culture, and he wants to go there too. We spent ages talking about it, like we used to talk when we got to see each other almost every day. In each pub we ended up sitting next to each other, and bought each other drinks. When we were walking through crowds, he put his hand on my back to guide me through, because I'm the smallest and most likely to get lost, and....I can't remember why...and I really wish I could. >..< He hugged me in one of the pubs. At one point, when talking about going to Japan, he said we could be the 'emperor and empress'. <<<By that point he was really drunk, but it still made me smile a little.
At the end, I had been carrying a birthday card he had bought for someone in my bag so it wouldn't get left behind anywhere or crumpled up, and when he was getting off the bus I forgot to give it back to him. So I rushed down the stairs and called him back to give it to him, and there was like a pause after he said thank you, like...Well, I wanted to hug goodbye, but decided against it in case he thought I was weird.
<3 I couldn't care less if we remain just friends forever, I just want to be able to see him more often, and know for certain I will never like anyone else. ^w^

I freaking love my friends. They are all awesome, and I wish I could be with them all the time.


Ok....To give this ramble some point to it. And sorry if there has already been a topic like it. I just don't see one on the front page where I can post, so...
What was your best day/night ever?
How important are your friends to you?
Do you have friends you haven't seen for years, but still would like to hang out with?
How are you different with each of your friends? eg. There is one who I'm super overly over competitive with. (Guy I arm wrestled.) But we've known each other most of our lives, and he's one of my best friends ever. Another, the one who organized the whole thing and got everyone to come out. She is amazing. Even though she's younger than me, I always feel like I look up to her, and I think I would consider her my 'best friend'. And the guy I like...We just get along amazingly well, and always seem to be interested in the same/similar things.
Do you feel sad when your friends fall out with each other/have you ever fallen out with any of your friends? (I honestly actually don't think I ever have. I hate it when they fall out with each other, but as far as I know, I'm still friends with every single one of them.)
Have you ever fallen for a best friend?

^w^ *Super amazingly awesomely happy right now.*

Edit: D: Darm this could have gone in best and worst things that have happened to you all week... Well...Please don't lock it. I tried to turn it into an original topic with the questions.

[Lavinia]

When we were walking through crowds, he put his hand on my back to guide me through, because I'm the smallest and most likely to get lost, and....I can't remember why...and I really wish I could. >..< He hugged me in one of the pubs. At one point, when talking about going to Japan, he said we could be the 'emperor and empress'. <<<By that point he was really drunk, but it still made me smile a little.
At the end, I had been carrying a birthday card he had bought for someone in my bag so it wouldn't get left behind anywhere or crumpled up, and when he was getting off the bus I forgot to give it back to him. So I rushed down the stairs and called him back to give it to him, and there was like a pause after he said thank you, like...Well, I wanted to hug goodbye, but decided against it in case he thought I was weird.
<3 I couldn't care less if we remain just friends forever, I just want to be able to see him more often, and know for certain I will never like anyone else. ^w^

This is so darn cute.

What was your best day/night ever?
I really don't have an answer to this question. My memory is very bad, I have trouble remembering key events, so I can't say. I would have to say that I remember one of my favourite nights was hanging out with my college buds, and the sun had just gone down and it was a beautiful Summer day and the sky was such a hazy blue. We had all goofed around and laughed a lot before, but at the moment it was just peaceful and relaxing, just enjoying one another's company, talking. My friend sang 'Somewhere only we know' and although he was terrible, it was just lovely.

How important are your friends to you?
Important. I love them all so much, I'm the type of person who can handle being alone - but I love to talk and listen, and as much as I know it sucks having a friend fall out with you, there's that wonderful feeling of having someone who knows you. My former best friend used to know my moods with a look, knew a lot of my likes and dislikes, she could gauge my reaction to anything before I even said a thing and could tell what I was thinking. We could finish each others sentences at times. She knew me better than my own family, it seemed.

Do you have friends you haven't seen for years, but still would like to hang out with?
Not really, no. People I love and adore I make a point to see and talk to frequently, if that's not possible I make sure I have contact with them whenever I can. If I don't talk to/see someone in a numerous number of years it means they're out of my life, and likely for a good reason.

How are you different with each of your friends?
Ah, very different. One of my friends is quiet so I talk a lot more calmly with her and and we have plenty of discussions, whilst another of my friends is out of this world, and she's just crazy. With her I'm laughing and cracking jokes every minute, not even an exaggeration, she drains my energy as she's always hyper. And one of my friends is very tease-able, he teases me a lot in kind, we pick on each other constantly - wrestle, play fight, do silly things etc. So it depends on their personalities really, you just act a certain way around different people. Generally though, I'm just myself around them all.

Do you feel sad when your friends fall out with each other/have you ever fallen out with any of your friends?
I've fallen out with a few friends, more because of a 'growing up' stage and realising that we formed different clashing opinions, or just no longer meshed so it was better to drift away. I do know some friends who have turned into dicks and total bitches, so I'm glad I have the excuse now that we just drifted apart. I generally have a good judge of character, so I know who to hang around/who I'd get along with. Most of my ex-friends are those who ended up fucking people over when they grew older, or just think they're the bees knees.

Have you ever fallen for a best friend?
I had a small teeensy, tiny crush on my best friend, but then I got over it. kinda. Sometimes I still get all fan girl over him, but that's down to him being such a babe/wonderful person. :3 Cough.

[LionJess]

What was your best day/night ever? Uhhh, I don't really just have one. I don't think, as far as I can say, that there's one night that specifically sticks in my head as being the best day ever. The past two years of my life have been pretty incredible though. There's been a good few days where I'd spend the whole day in university, go back to someones house to get food, get ready and pre-drink together and then go out, and go into lectures the next day just one big dying mess. I'm glad for the most part, I get on with my class.


Then, given how I'm currently feeling, my first date with Cormac was pretty much the best date ever. Or if you wanna go WAY back in the day, about four years ago when I was seeing my now-best friend, and we went to the cinema on a double date with one of our other close friends and a girl he was seeing. That was just an awesome day in general because I got to be with the guy I was crazy about and two of my best friends.

Actually, my best night ever was probably the night of my 21st birthday party. I had such a ridiculous stress because the place I wanted it to be in cancelled about two weeks before the party because they were closing down. I had such a great day though, I booked into a hotel with my two girlfriends to stay for the night, I got my hair/make up done and my mum took us out for dinner. I'd been stressing about people showing up, and a ridiculous amount of people came, a ton of people from university and my entire family. Everyone was just in a great mood, I felt... ridiculously, euphorically happy, and Cormac was so good to me that night, especially with all of the nosey relatives and people constantly asking for pictures of us. And I ended up spending the last bit of the night by going to a club after my party at like 4am with my two closest girlfriends and him. It was perfect.

How important are your friends to you? Ridiculously important. I'm an only child, my friends basically ARE my family. That said, it's not like I have to see them every day. We're a bit older now and realistically I don't get to see the people I want to because we have other commitments. But it's always great when we get to catch up. There's a couple of people that I pretty much have to talk to every day or else I'll get really twitchy, restless and sad. My friend Christina has been away for the past two weeks or so and I'm going insane without her.

Do you have friends you haven't seen for years, but still would like to hang out with? I wouldn't say years, but it's been months for some of them. Hannah, one of my close friends from high school, I rarely get to see. It's probably been about 9 months. The same goes for Braien (the close friend I mentioned in the first paragraph), especially because the guy works insanely hard. I haven't seen my best friend, Bryan, in months - but that's because I don't get along with his girlfriend and he pretty much spends every day with her. Fiona, a close girlfriend of mine, is living in America for the summer so I haven't seen her since about May, that sucks. then there's friends who live abroad who I reaaaaaallly want to see too.


How are you different with each of your friends? I would say I'm basically the same person. I'm usually the one who takes care of everyone else and listens if I go out with the guys though, because they're fucking idiots sometimes. Braien and I tend to have these ridiculous heart-to-hearts about life and everything about the world and he's probably one of the only people that I can be brutally honest with, be an absolute cunt or an emotional wreck and he puts it into context. I'm not really like that with most people.

Do you feel sad when your friends fall out with each other/have you ever fallen out with any of your friends? I'm not speaking to the girl I considered my best friend for the past decade. It's been about 7 months now, and to be honest, I don't think we'll make up. It's painful and raw, I don't like talking about it, but at the same time I'm kind of over it, because it's a ridiculous reason to throw away such a good friendship and I've tried so many times to make up. She's just a completely different person to who I knew. It's really upsetting.

Otherwise with inter-group fighting... it doesn't really happen these days. if it does, they're mature enough not to drag everyone else into it.


Have you ever fallen for a best friend? Ahahah. You could say that. Bry was my first love, the first guy I slept with, the first person I was really completely crazy about. It took years and years for me to get over him (realistically, I'm only truly over it last year, so about 3 years), a lot of work on both our parts to stop being stupid and drunkenly hook up, but I can safely say I'm over him now. I wouldn't take back what happened though. You have to be sooo careful with feelings you have for a best friend, it's too easy to fuck things up completely.

[Fujoshi Otaku]

Have you ever fallen for a best friend? Ahahah. You could say that. Bry was my first love, the first guy I slept with, the first person I was really completely crazy about. It took years and years for me to get over him (realistically, I'm only truly over it last year, so about 3 years), a lot of work on both our parts to stop being stupid and drunkenly hook up, but I can safely say I'm over him now. I wouldn't take back what happened though. You have to be sooo careful with feelings you have for a best friend, it's too easy to fuck things up completely.

>..< Sorry if it is too personal, but how worth it would you say it is to try to go for it with a best friend, if you really can't just get over them?
I am the person who always says: Whatever. I do not need relationships/love and never will, and I will stay a virgin 'til the day I die, so I'd be a complete let down in any potential relationship. But, ever since Saturday, I can not stop thinking about him. He's one of my best friends and I do not want to ruin it. He always knew that I liked him years ago, and it didn't affect us in any way. We could still talk and be friends, and he made it clear then that that was what he wanted. But, it felt different on Saturday. I don't know if it was my deluded brain, but it kind of felt like I might have a chance. But, would you say it is worth the risk?
-.-U Sorry to be asking you this, but it's probably best to get a completely unbiased opinion, and I don't want to bug my friends with it.

[LionJess]

>..< Sorry if it is too personal, but how worth it would you say it is to try to go for it with a best friend, if you really can't just get over them?
I am the person who always says: Whatever. I do not need relationships/love and never will, and I will stay a virgin 'til the day I die, so I'd be a complete let down in any potential relationship. But, ever since Saturday, I can not stop thinking about him. He's one of my best friends and I do not want to ruin it. He always knew that I liked him years ago, and it didn't affect us in any way. We could still talk and be friends, and he made it clear then that that was what he wanted. But, it felt different on Saturday. I don't know if it was my deluded brain, but it kind of felt like I might have a chance. But, would you say it is worth the risk?
-.-U Sorry to be asking you this, but it's probably best to get a completely unbiased opinion, and I don't want to bug my friends with it.

I think if he made it clear that friendship is what he wanted then you need to accept that. If he was flirting with you or giving you mixed signals then you should be able to openly talk about it with him, if he is your best friend. Your view on relationships is quite a naive one and given you don't want a boyfriend who touches you, or has a sex life with you, realistically a relationship is not going to work. You will eventually get over him, I thought I couldn't either, it just takes time and a hell of a lot of work.


I'm an advocate of trying if you believe there's something there, yes, but you have to be realistic about it, ie: if you both have similar feelings for each other, and realistically, is there a chance a relationship could feasibly work. If the answer to either of those questions is even slightly no, it is not worth the risk. It's incredibly damaging to a friendship, and difficult to pull it back to "just friends" - especially if one of you still has feelings. It's one of the most difficult things our friendship ever had to go through and it pushed it to breaking point several times. I think from a guys perspective, it takes a very special guy who can handle their best friend still having feelings for them and allow them to be mad at them when they need to.

[Fujoshi Otaku]

I asked him out once when I was about 15, and he said no because he didn't want a relationship at that time. (We had only known each other about a week at that point, and he had just broken up with another one of my friends, who met him at exactly the same time I did. XDD Ironically both of us fell for him instantly. But she was a b**ch and dumped him for some other guy. She did that a lot. Different boyfriend each week. I still wonder what would have happened if our roles had been reversed.)

He wasn't flirting...I don't think. But then I am oblivious to everything until it's pointed out. We got along really well. Somehow, we always end up being into the same things, and we were talking about Japanese history, etc. and I just loved being able to talk to him like that.
This is absolutely stupid, but a little while ago I went to a palm reader who actually got a lot of things right. She said I was about to meet my 'soul mate', and I couldn't stop thinking about that when we just went perfectly together on Saturday. A few other friends said they think he fancies me, but they know how I feel and they know I'm not the kind of person who would go for it so easily, so they might just have been saying it to make me happy. And then there was the way he had his hand on my back through the crowds, and the way he smiled when I gave the card back to him. But I read too much into things that could probably be explained as good friendship.

And I know my views aren't realistic, and I hate it. I think it is because I have a mild form of autism, and past events got it into my head that it is a disgusting rather than natural thing. That other guy didn't help either, always wanting physical contact 24/7. I do not think he would be like that, though, and I have the odd feeling it would be ok for him to hug/kiss me. Anything more still kind of scares me though, but maybe I'd be able to change for him.

-.-U I think I was over him. Or almost anyway. I didn't see him for three years, and obviously wanted to see him sometimes, like I wanted to see the rest of my friends. But I didn't ask them for him like I used to do when I was younger. XD Now I'm scared of losing contact again. I think I partly want to ask him out because that way I can secure a place in his life. Being just friends, I worry that if he gets another girlfriend, she wont like him being friends with other girls, and I wont be able to see him again. -.-U Maybe that is selfish.


We're so similar in interests and we get along so well that I think it could maybe work. But I'm not sure about his feelings. So maybe it isn't such a good idea to risk it. X3 I've never ruined a friendship with a good friend before. XD It's like none of them can do anything wrong, ever.
He is one of those special guys, though. He has known all along. I don't know if he knows I still like him, but he knew the whole time back then, and it didn't freak him out at all.

Thank you, anyway. I think I'll just continue being friends because I don't want to ruin anything. When he gets someone else, hopefully they will be nice and accepting of his friends.

[LionJess]

Ah, I assumed it was a relatively recent thing where he said he didn't want a relationship.

It is really up to you to do what you think is best for you. Most people will have things they're looking for in a relationship, people do have sexual needs and desires as you obviously know, so if that wasn't something that you think you'd ever actually want then it's probably best to remain friends. If that's something that you could envision yourself one day wanting, then it's more realistic to consider some sort of romantic relationship.

If this guy is a good friend of yours though then it should be something you could bring up with him in conversation, even if it's only casually to see where he stands.

[Fujoshi Otaku]

Well, I'm not entirely sure whether he's turned me down just that once, or another time since then.

XD It's weird, but virginity is something I pride myself on. That's one of the many reasons why I don't want to go there. I was mortified when that other guy 'stole' my first kiss, especially since I didn't like it, and that is obviously something that would be an even bigger regret.
I know for certain that I wouldn't even consider letting any other guy take that away from me in a million years. But if I was in a serious relationship with him, I have the feeling I could trust him.

>..< True. I know everyone probably 'goes through' this at school, but every time I liked a guy they ended up hating me for no reason I could understand. I stayed away from them. Or I thought I did. Ok, I did try to talk to them a little, and maybe that, and the fact that other people spread rumours about how I was saying rude things about them, freaked them out.
He's the first guy who hasn't hated me because I liked him, possibly because we're friends and he knows I'm not like that. Still, because of all that ^ I'm afraid that talking to him about it will make him hate me. -.-U
:/ I'm one of those idiots who thinks if I say the tiniest thing out of line in front of anyone, even family sometimes, they will hate me.