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Proud Of Your Virginity?

- - - - - virgin sexuality sex First time never had sex

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#1
Okano

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Are you proud of being a virgin?

 

In a time when sex is so prevalent, it's easy to lose one's virginity, but let's try thinking of it the other way. Isn't it good to remain a virgin until you're with the person you think you will marry? It's something to be proud of these days in my opinion.

 

I'm a virgin. I used to think about having sex with someone a lot. I could have a few times. but I don't think about it so much anymore. I want it to mean something, not just something I do because it feels good. Faith had alot to do with it for me. I won't bring faith into this, but I was born a christian, then stopped being christian and lived without God, then studied Islam and almost embraced it, then I truly became a christian. I say this about faith to show that I'm not just a "bible thumper" here. I've had my share of time without God so to say. I choose to be a virgin until the right time regardless of my faith.

 

Are you proud of being a virgin? How do you feel about it? Let's try to leave faith out of it.


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#2
Steve 

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I was as proud to be a virgin as I am to not be a virgin really. Sure, my first time was memorable but it didn't and doesn't affect how I feel about sex now. I didn't exactly lose my virginity in the way I expected, to the girl I loved and whatnot, and afterwards I did feel bad about how it turned out. Then I learned to just enjoy sex for what it is and not put it on this huge pedestal I used to. 

 

If anything, losing my virginity took a lot of social pressure off of me and made me think a lot less about sex as a whole. 


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#3
Crispin

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I don't know, I don't see it as a big deal or a 'gift'. I mean, it's just an act really. I don't understand how it's special. So I don't know if this is more of an upbringing thing, or a particular influence. Although this probably has to do with old age traditions of keeping people's sexual activity under wraps, I'm guessing. (this isn't a response to any of the above posts, which I didn't read, just saying as most people squee over it.)


Having said that though, I'm going to be the 40 year old virgin. I'm just in that permanent stage of men not interesting me, and I don't think I'm going to get over it soon. 

 

Also, amusing when OP says he won't bring faith into the discussion, discusses his previous/current faith and then says not to talk about it. Eh. 


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#4
meetodafreako

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I don't feel any different having had sex as not having sex.

It's an act, and I really don't feel compelled to go around fucking randoms like some people play off losing virginity does to you.
but sex is still really nice


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#5
Steve 

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This is just my opinion, and my god, I'm going to sound like my mother. There's a difference between senseless fucking and more intimate sex (I hate the term 'making love', my god). I think personally if there's no real feelings between the two people, then the sex can be satisfying, sure, but it doesn't feel all that intimate, and so it wouldn't be considered by me a gift to anyone or really, all that big a deal. But if you're emotionally attached and love the person you're sleeping with, it does feel like more of a special act, ridiculously intimate and like you're giving that person a massive part of yourself. I guess because you're much more emotionally open then. And I suppose the stereotypical view of virginity is that when you give it to someone, hopefully that first time would be like that. 

 

It's very hard to put this into words without sounding like a ridiculous self help book.

Well I agree, it's a lot better making love than just having sex. Making love has a more intimate feel to it, I'm much happier making love than just having sex, and both me and my partner would be willing to do more to make the other happy whilst making love. I can't speak for everyone, but I can probably bet on the fact that people have such a better time making love, after all, everyone likes to be cared for.

 

Anyway, on topic: I think your mindset changes a lot once you have lost your virginity. Whether you make love or just have a one night stand, you're going to feel differently about sex afterwards. There's no denying there is a lot of social pressure nowadays on having sex and that does affect you, whether you cave into it (like I did) or you stand militantly against it.

 

 

 

 

 

Making love.


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#6
Steve 

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Do people really think there's a social pressure to have sex? I mean, it's talked about a lot - but I didn't feel bad about being a virgin. I think it really undermines peoples ability to think for themselves and realise that it's really noone elses business but their own. I mean, it's fine to laugh and joke about it but I really don't think there's a sort of "God you're such a loser how long has it been since you last had sex!?" attitude. 

It's more along the lines of High School and College that it happens, and mostly to guys. It could just be my area, but I can't think of a single guy that didn't talk about sex during high school years. 


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#7
Anne-Marie

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No. Not having sex isn't very hard so I don't see any reason for me to be proud of that. I understand how someone would feel some kind of pride over a certain belief they have behind their decision, but I have none.

I'm not ashamed of it, either, I just don't feel that strongly about it.
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#8
Nereus

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I lost my virginity when I was 17. There was no social pressure and there wasn't any stigma associated with it. I didn't have to lose it when I was 17. It's no one's business really whether I lost my virginity or not. I wasn't going to lose it for the sake of losing it with someone I didn't care about because that's just silly. I enjoy sex, and after losing my virginity, I really didn't think about it anymore. I was proud because I waited until I was 17, when kids today are losing it at age 12. I'm not sure why there is such a social stigma attached to it. Is it that important to lose your virginity just for the sake of losing it?


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#9
KimberleyAnn'

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i lost mine to my boyfriend (Now) and i took his. i believe if you guys are ready for it and safe than go ahead. But if your pressured into it than no. For me and my boyfriend it makes us alot closer as it has. :D


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#10
meetodafreako

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^^TWELVE

WHAT
WHAT
WAT
4ZGo73Z.png

 

 

 

please tell me you are exaggerating to prove a point.
please


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#11
KimberleyAnn'

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12 i know a girl here who got pregant at 10 LIKE SERIOUSLY !!!!!!!! YOU STILL LIKE PLAYING WITH BARBIE DOLLS AT THAT AGE


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#12
IamAshley.

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I'm a virgin, and I wouldn't say I'm exactly proud of it, but I'm happy I haven't lost it from social pressures, or just wanting to do it to seem "cool" or whatever.

My boyfriend and I have been dating for 8 months, and we're both sure we want to have sex with each other, but we want to wait until the legal age, which in this state is 16, we might not even last that long but only time will tell I guess.

I want to have sex when I know I'm ready and when I'm confident with myself and who I am as a person, and I'm with the person I love. I don't want it to be just some random in a school bathroom or whatever, I want it to be special.


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#13
KimberleyAnn'

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That made me laugh ... jess


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#14
Insane Pie

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I never really saw my virginity as that big of deal. I lost it younger than most. I may not be so proud to who I lost it to, but not being a virgin wasn't that big of a deal. I find that people who want to lose it to someone they "love" or whatever to be kind of ridiculous. Nothing against them or anyone on here who thinks that way, but that's just my opinion.


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#15
Okano

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Lol you guys make me laugh sometimes. 12? Lol to each their own I suppose. It wasn't my intention to demean anyone who wasn't a virgin. We're all equal. I hope no one thought otherwise :) I wonder though, with media and such, isn't that a form of pressuring to have sex? I mean it desensitizes the mind and it makes it seem acceptable to have sex now where as in the past it might not have seemed to be such a relaxed subject. (Before television, contemporary 20th and 21st century music, and the internet.) So I wonder if those things play a significant role on a subconcsious level even if we don't exactly realize it.

 

Also, amusing when OP says he won't bring faith into the discussion, discusses his previous/current faith and then says not to talk about it.

 

Was giving context to show that I know what it's like to not be a, "religion spouter" or that I used to be and still am somewhat secular. Also to show that it has played a small role in my decision making.


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#16
finality

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wouldn't consider virginity to be important in any way. would hate to be with a guy who didn't want to sleep with me.

I wonder though, with media and such, isn't that a form of pressuring to have sex? I mean it desensitizes the mind and it makes it seem acceptable to have sex now where as in the past it might not have seemed to be such a relaxed subject. (Before television, contemporary 20th and 21st century music, and the internet.) So I wonder if those things play a significant role on a subconcsious level even if we don't exactly realize it.

No. The idea of not having sex til marriage is the social construct. In the past it was also unacceptable to be gay or for women to wear pants. Things becoming more socially acceptable gives people the freedom to make decisions for themselves. That's important. The restrictions society imposed on people in the past were in no way positive.
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#17
Innocence

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I was as proud to be a virgin as I am to not be a virgin really. Sure, my first time was memorable but it didn't and doesn't affect how I feel about sex now. Then I learned to just enjoy sex for what it is and not put it on this huge pedestal I used to. 


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#18
Insane Pie

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Think I should have explained that better. When I said love, I mean in love with someone. Specifcally when it comes to teenage girls, atleast in my experience. A few of my female friends want to wait till they are "in love" with someone, which in my opinion, it's just a strong emotion for that other person, which they confuse the two. Which, it never works out.

 

Also, I enjoy the sex more when it's with someone I care about more. But I'm not going to confuse that for love, etc.


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#19
Insane Pie

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I agree that it's possible and it's completely understandle that they would wait. But with that type of love, it just ends with heart break most of the time. But that's my opinion.


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#20
Alzran

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I gave away my virginity to my first girlfriend when I was 16, only to find out she was just using me the whole time as a fallback in case she couldn't find someone else to have sex with that day. It kinda gave me a sour taste, and made me think that's what sex was about. Just doing what you can with whoever you can as often as you can. There are days where I wish I could go back and redo it, but then again, would I want to? It's experiences like that which have helped shape me into who I am today. 


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